Thursday, May 10, 2012

Rabbits and Boxing (but not a rabbit punch)

If you just watched the video (if you didn't, you're going to have to stop now or nothing else will make sense) you'll understand why that bunny died a couple seconds later. It wasn't all our fault we literally scared it to death; it was kind of wet from our dog and cat's mauling when we found it. We just finished it off. I fed it sugar water (which Morgan thought was lemonade) and I think it may have sent its little heart into cardiac arrest. We gave the bunny a proper funeral, then ate ice cream. Ice cream helps everything.

This is a boxing match Halle set up between the T-rex and Parasarolophus. Man, that second dinosaur is way harder to pronounce. That's probably why it isn't as popular. Come on, paleontologists - give us something the kids can say (or at least the moms)! I don't know who's going to win, but I'm betting the fish don't leave the match happy. If you're thinking to yourself, "What's up with Halle's hair?" you wouldn't be alone. Halle is into styling it herself these days, including giving herself and her sister a trim. It's kind of nice because then if someone asks me who cuts their hair because they don't ever want to go there, I can have complete deniability. At least Halle isn't boxing her sister. You can always find something to be grateful for. Right now, I think I'll place my bet on the Parasarolophus. His arms are longer.

Friday, May 4, 2012

Surgery #7

The best thing about hospitals is that they are temporary. (This is the same as to say that nothing is the best thing about hospitals.) You can get through just about anything with pain pills and the knowledge that it won't last for long. Willie had surgery almost a week ago and I discovered that I have basically conquered the hospital. I felt sorry for the rookies in the waiting room as they tried to entertain themselves. Here are my rules for waiting:
1. Leave the waiting room immediately after your loved one is taken back. You are going to be hungry, and there is no way you'll find out anything for hours. This is the best time to find the only vending machine that carries Cheetos. You're not supposed to eat in the waiting rooms, so you should also practice eating really sneakily. 
2. Sit next to someone entertaining. If you lose interest in your book, you can eavesdrop. I sat next to a lady with dementia who was convinced that she had caused something awful to happen. My great grandmother used to eat toilet paper so I'm pretty sure I'll end up as one of those old ladies. 
3. Bring a cell phone charger. If you're anything like me, the only person who calls you on a regular basis is your mom. But at a hospital, your phone blows up with text messages and phone calls from all sorts of people. I realized during this hospital stint that I have exactly six people programmed into my phone that I don't know who they are. 

This hospital stay was the best one so far. The surgery went better than expected. God took care of everything just like always, and my Mom was able to fly out to help. Grandmas are very important, special people even if they don't know how to work remote controls very well.